Goldilocks And The Three Work-Life Balance Schemes

You'd think after all these years in academic research, I would've found the optimal balance between being more productive by taking work home with me, and protecting my personal life by leaving work behind in lab. But no, instead of occupying a happy middle ground, I swing wildly back-and-forth between doing absolutely no work at home and spending all my evenings and weekends working from home.

This bed is too hard.
During grad school, I didn't set any work-life boundaries at all. My labmates were also my buddies, and since they were similarly boundary-less, long days and nights in lab counted as both work and socializing. Work completely bled into life, but this was a perfectly adequate arrangement...until I encountered some roadblocks in my project. Since there was no time when I was completely free of work, when work wasn't going smoothly, well, I became miserable all the time. I had no protected work-free time in which to recharge, and I burned myself out.

This bed is too soft.
By the time I started my postdoc, I'd learned my lesson. I worked hard when I was in lab and stayed there till I had finished everything I needed to do. Once I left lab at the end of the day, I didn't let work intrude on my personal time. But there were problems with this arrangement as well. To get everything done without having to take work home, I had to be super-efficient during the day, leaving little time for interacting with my labmates. And since people tended to chat about their projects informally throughout the day, I missed out not only on the socializing but also on these impromptu scientific discussions. And then there were the late nights spent working on my computer in lab, wishing I were at least working on my computer at home with March Hare and Dormouse for company.

Where the hell is the bed that's just right?
In my current position, I do a lot less bench work and a lot more paperwork, which makes it all the more tempting to leave lab early enough to have dinner with March Hare everyday, and then work from home in the evenings. But March Hare tends to get a little annoyed (and rightfully so) when I ignore him all evening, or when he tries to have a conversation with me and I only actually hear 30% of what he's said. On the other hand, not bringing work home would either result in really long hours in lab or not getting nearly enough stuff done. Until I find the elusive "just right" solution, I've resorted to alternating between "too hard" and "too soft," depending on my workload, deadlines, and my mood. Not the most stable of solutions, but I still have a job and a husband, so it must be working, right?