Monday, March 31, 2008

Six Word Meme

Amanda tagged me for the six word meme, so here it is!

Here are the instructions:

  1. Write your own six word memoir.
  2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.
  3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
  4. Tag five more blogs with links.
  5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.

Which way to my life, please?




A Good Nap Fixes Many Things



I tag:

  1. The Bean Chronicles
  2. Blue Lab Coats
  3. Dr. Jekyll & Mrs. Hyde
  4. Science Cog
  5. Arduous

Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Bounds Of Tolerance

I've been meaning to write about my own deconversion1 ever since I read CAE's "scarlet letter" post, but have been putting it off largely because I couldn't decide what to say. One part of me believes in tolerance and respect for other people's beliefs and opinions, while the other part seethes at the sheer ignorance, irrationality, and bigotry of the religious conservatives. You can imagine that these two voices have been engaged in bitter debate over the tone this post should take.

In the aftermath of the expulsion incident, Propter Doc has written an excellent post calling for moderation and tolerance on both sides. My inclination is to agree with her...to live and let live. I have religious friends who are intelligent, thoughtful, and progressive, and whose opinions I respect and value. And I was once a born-again, fundamentalist Christian who was undoubtedly every bit as obnoxious to others as fundamentalist Christians now seem to me. So why shouldn't the two sides agree to tolerate each other and move on?

But it's not quite that simple. This isn't just about whether the religious right believes in evolution...frankly, I'm of the same opinion as the bumper sticker. This is about religious conservatives sinking their claws into every major socio-political issue and infesting policy with their dogma. Should we tolerate pharmacists who would sit in moral judgment of a rape victim and refuse to fill her prescription for the morning-after pill? Should we tolerate homophobes who use religion to justify their bigotry and have pushed through constitutional amendments banning same-sex marriage in multiple states? How about some tolerance for the publishers of the "Nuremberg files" website?

Perhaps these are extreme examples, but I think American society has taken a sharp rightward turn over the last several years, due largely to the agitations of the the religious right. What lies in that direction is a theocracy, which is someplace I have zero inclination to visit. And in trying to force everyone else to live by their rules, religious conservatives violate what I consider to be the basic requirement for tolerance, which is that they don't attempt to shove their dogma down my throat.

So I'll agree that flame wars and calling religious conservatives "demented right-wing wackaloon theocratic douchemonkeys" a la PhysioProf probably isn't very constructive. But I find myself to be all out of tolerance at the moment for the Robertson-Falwell-Dobson type of douchemon...er, religious conservatives.

1So this turned out not to be a deconversion post after all. Perhaps I'll tell that story some other time.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Annual Love-Fest

The faculty and staff of my institution all received an email from the dean today telling us how exceptionally talented we are, how honored he is to be working with us, and thanking us for our dedication and commitment to excellence.

What prompted this effusive declaration?

Yup, you've guessed it. The 2008 US News & World Report graduate school rankings are out. My institution usually does well in these rankings, so once a year, we get a nice little "Hip hip hurray!" from the dean.

Do you suppose he'll give us all a raise to show his appreciation?

Well, how about a nice big shot of insulin instead?

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Foolish Expectations

There was a time when meadow, grove, and stream,
The earth, and every common sight,
To me did seem
Apparelled in celestial light,
The glory and the freshness of a dream.
It is not now as it hath been of yore;--
Turn wheresoe'er I may,
By night or day,
The things which I have seen I now can see no more.

~William Wordsworth


I wonder if everyone else has felt this way about academic research.

So many people I know who choose academic research do so with high hopes and great expectations--to make new discoveries, to cure diseases, to contribute to humanity. We envision a community of scientists who develop exciting new hypotheses and build on each other's findings to advance knowledge and understanding. We imagine that our own work will answer interesting questions and solve important problems.

But what we find instead is that research is tedious, experiments fail, and the answers we get...when we get any at all...are murky. Progress occurs at a snail's pace and our own contributions are but a few insignificant raindrops falling into the ocean. The community of scientists turns out to be a rat race, full of politics, cliques, and maneuvering for position. We do the experiments that can be published, and study the areas that can be funded.

It's not exactly the glorious intellectual enterprise we had expected.

But it's still worth doing...isn't it?


Tuesday, March 25, 2008

How Many Pieces Of Flair Do You Have?

I found a link to this Science Creative Quarterly post over at Blue Lab Coats, and it's freakin' hilarious!


The “works with very small and potentially dangerous organisms” badge. In which recipient conducts hazardous research on very small creatures.
Hey, why isn't there a picture of a virus? This is viral discrimination, you...you...bacterial supremacists!



The “sexing up science” badge. In which the recipient has had experience with things such as selective breeding, crossing, mate selection, prokaryotic conjugation, fertility studies, STD related microbiology, and/or any other acceptable interpretation of the badge.
Bacteria and yeast and mice (not with each other, of course). Oh, and two of my labmates started dating each other. Does that count?


The “I work with way too much radioactivity, and yet still no discernable superpowers yet” badge. Although not for lack of trying….
Many, many Southern blots and some metabolic labeling. No superpowers, but I've grown a third arm, which is quite useful!




The “I’ve set fire to stuff” badge (LEVEL IV). In which the recipient has set fire to his or herself while performing experiments in the name of science. Cooking or drinking accidents do not qualify one for this badge.
Um...if you ever have to sterilize something by dipping it in ethanol and flaming it, make sure you don't get ethanol on the part that you're holding onto.


The “has frozen stuff just to see what happens” badge (LEVEL III). In which the recipient has frozen something in liquid nitrogen for the sake of scientific curiosity.
We froze some Wright's stain (among other things) in liquid nitrogen. It made very pretty purplish blobs...until someone fished the blobs out and promptly dropped them. Let's just say we spent some time scrubbing the floors.... (See also badge below)


The “has done science whilst under the influence” badge. This can apply to both achieving moments of intellectual clarity or actual performance of an experiment whilst under the influence. It presumes talking about science under the influence a given.
We periodically have lab happy hours...in lab. 'Nuff said.


Let me know if you get your own badges so I can come see!

Monday, March 24, 2008

All Hands Abandon Ship

I wrote about scientists' fear of getting scooped on publications in a recent post. I must have been prescient.

My labmate and I just got scooped by a really high-profile paper on a project we had been working on together. The senior author (SA) on the paper was the one who published the original findings on which our studies were based (also in a high-profile paper). Since this area of research is somewhat outside our field of expertise, whereas SA is a bigwig of bigwigs in the field, being beaten by SA wasn't really that much of a surprise.

But goddamn, it still sucks!

Strategically, our best option now is to dump our results in a lower-tier journal and abandon ship. It's clear that we are no match for SA's lab, especially since I and my labmate were each working part-time on this as a side project. If we continue to compete directly with SA on this, we'll just get steamrolled. Not to mention the fact that we each still have our primary projects to worry about.

But even though the pragmatic path is obvious, I have to say it's really hard to let go of something in which we've invested time, effort, and interest. I'm really tempted to do just a few more experiments to see if there's any novel finding we can salvage from this. And not just for the purpose of soothing our bruised egos, but because it's so unpalatable to just slink away with our tails between our legs.

I suppose this is one of the hazards of working in a hot area--the competition is fierce and the chances of getting scooped are high. But having no competition isn't anything to jump up-and-down about either--it usually means nobody else thinks that area of research is interesting enough to pursue.

Sigh...a whole lot of work just to get our asses kicked. I really want a drink and our 95% EtOH is starting to look inviting right about now.

Something to ponder over your drink of choice: does competition in science result in higher quality and greater progress, or just a lot of waste and redundancy? Competition can motivate scientists to do better work, provide quality control through reproduction of results by multiple groups, and encourage development of better experimental systems. But competition can also cause scientists to be careless and to cut corners in order to publish first. And let's not forget the hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars spent by the runner-ups just to publish a "me too" paper.

So is competition in science a net positive or net negative?

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Change Of Scenery

I got bored with the old template, so I switched to this one instead. I like the fact that the main column is wider, so my more long-winded paragraphs don't look like they're a page long. But I'm not so crazy about the actual background--makes me want to be somewhere else. Somewhere warm, sunny, and by the sea....

What do you think? Keep this one, switch back, or pick another one? And don't suggest learning enough html to make my own--I can barely bold and italicize text as it is!

Lab Karma

In our lab, people often ask each other to review drafts of manuscripts. Unless I'm extraordinarily busy, I'm always happy to do it. I think of it as a way of circulating good karma around the lab.

Recently, I was reviewing a grad student's manuscript draft and thought the abstract would work better if the information were reorganized and some of the statements phrased differently. Rather than writing a whole bunch of suggestions for specific changes, I simply gave the student an explanation of the overall concept I had in mind and wrote her a "sample abstract" illustrating my points. I told her the sample abstract was an example of how I thought her abstract should be written.

About a week later, the student asked me to read a second draft of the manuscript. As I started making my way through it, I found myself thinking, "Wow, I really like this abstract!"

And then, "Waaaait a minute...."

Yes, the student had taken my sample abstract and inserted it word-for-word in place of her own.

I've given suggestions by writing sample paragraphs before, but have never had this result. And this was not a co-authorship situation in which the manuscript is jointly written. It's not that I expect authorship or some other reward for suggestions I give on manuscripts--like I said, it's all about good karma. But this really annoyed me.

Granted, I did not explicitly state that the student could not use the sample abstract I had written as her own. In fact, if she had simply asked if she could use it, I probably would've said yes. But filching it without so much as a "if you don't mind" is the equivalent of asking someone to show you how to perform a technique, and then having that person "demonstrate" on your actual samples so that the person ends up doing your entire experiment for you.

There may not be anything wrong with what this student did from a letter-of-the-law perspective, but I think it's laziness and taking advantage. And it's very bad lab karma.

Friday, March 21, 2008

"Math Is Hard!" ~Barbie

March Hare and I were watching the news yesterday and happened to catch a report on gas prices. The segment starts with Blonde Female Reporter (BFR) walking around a gas station pointing out the exorbitant prices and lamenting the pain this is causing motorists.

But exactly how much pain is this causing? Let's not deal with abstractions here--the viewers need precise calculations of the number of miles they can travel on one of their hard-earned dollars. Unfortunately, to solve this problem, BFR must defeat the vicious and dreaded monster, Math. Oh, woe is her! What ever shall she do?

Have no fear...Knight in Shining Armor (KSA) is standing by to be interviewed. KSA happens to be a math professor at no-name college, and will gallantly save BFR from the evil Math monster. As BFR watches in awe, KSA whips out his trusty marker, thrusts it at a whiteboard, and valiantly divides a car's fuel efficiency (miles/gallon) by the price of gas (dollars/gallon) to triumphantly generate number of miles per dollar.

Having slain the Math beast, KSA further dazzles BFR with his marker skills by doing a sample calculation using a fuel efficiency of 15 miles/gallon and a gas price of 3 dollars/gallon. With a flourish, KSA reveals how flipping the 3 dollars/gallon upside-down makes the problem so much easier, and thereby captures BFR's heart and eternal adoration.

[End segment]

I swear, by the end of this I must've had steam coming out my ears!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Time To Build An Ark


Seriously, this flooding is not good. Our house is on high ground and safe from the waters, but getting to and from work requires alternate routes. Hope you're all staying dry!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I'm So Screwed!

I played in an NFL football pool with a bunch of people from my lab during the regular season. I did pretty well too--I was in first place for a while and won several of the weekly pools. Sadly, I got overtaken late in the season and ended up in second place overall. No cash prize for me.

So when my labmate came to persuade me to play in a March Madness pool, luring me with promises of redemption and a second chance at fame and glory, I fell for it hook, line and sinker.

But now I'm looking at this bracket, which I have to fill out by sometime tomorrow morning. My first thoughts:

  1. I've never heard of half of these schools.

  2. Since when did we have states called Portland, Boise, and Kent?

  3. Isn't gonzaga a type of cheese? Oh, wait...that's gorgonzola.

  4. "Mount St. Mary" sounds vaguely obscene.

  5. So does "Oral Roberts."

And slowly, my error in judgment dawns on me. I am a football fanatic. I watch the games, read ESPN's football news and analysis, know the teams and players...I even watch the friggin' draft, for crying out loud! I'm guessing that helped my performance in the football pool.

But college basketball? I've never watched a game. I am so gonna get my ass kicked in this pool. My visions of triumph fade away, and now the "automatically populate my bracket with top seeds" button is starting to sing its siren song.

Anyone know anything about college hoops? Anyone? Anyone???

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Ebola: Coming Soon To A Lab Near You!

Viruses Are Cool #8
Click here to read the introduction to this series.

Thanks to movies like "Outbreak" and books like The Hot Zone, the name "Ebola" inevitably conjures up images of a panic-stricken populace, medical workers in biohazard suits, and terrified victims locked away in isolation chambers and bleeding from every orifice.

Sensationalism, perhaps. But the biohazard suits are there for a reason. Ebola virus is classified at Biosafety Level 4 (BSL-4), which is the highest biohazard classification and is defined by the CDC as the level "required for work with dangerous and exotic agents that pose a high individual risk of aerosol-transmitted laboratory infections and life-threatening disease." Unlike working at the BSL-2 or BSL-3 levels, few vaccinations are required for BSL-4 work because most BSL-4 agents currently have no efficacious vaccines or treatments. The death of a Russian scientist in 2004 who had accidentally injected herself with Ebola while working with the virus only underscores the dangers of working with such agents.

While the BSL-4 safety precautions and protocols are essential for protecting researchers from accidental exposure, and the public from a breach in containment, these measures also impede the rate of progress in studying BSL-4 agents. There are only a handful of BSL-4 research facilities in this country where Ebola can be studied, and the number of trained personnel is also limiting. But scientists at the University of Wisconsin, Madison recently announced the development of a "safe version" of Ebola which they believe will not replicate in animals or humans. If true, this would allow researchers to study Ebola without BSL-4 precautions.

In their PNAS paper, Halfmann et al. reported the generation of an Ebola virus lacking the VP30 transcription factor, without which the virus cannot replicate. In order to generate virus particles for study, the mutant virus was grown in cells which were engineered to express VP30, thereby complementing the virus' VP30 deficiency. Although the mutant virus replicates efficiently in this complementing cell line, it should be unable to spread beyond these cells because it requires the cells' supply of VP30. The authors go on to show that virus particles produced in the complementing cell line are morphologically indistinguishable from wild-type Ebola, and that the VP30 deficiency was genetically stable for seven serial passages in the complementing cell line. They therefore propose to use this "biologically contained" virus as a means of safely studying Ebola outside the confines of BSL-4 facilities.

Although such a system would greatly facilitate the study of Ebola, there are several significant concerns. First, viruses are known to be able to undergo recombination with host genetic material. It is therefore possible that with longterm serial passaging in the complementing cell line, the mutant virus may re-acquire VP30 and emerge as wild-type Ebola. In fact, growth of other types of replication-defective viruses in complementing cell lines can produce that exact result. Second, the authors did not test whether the virus particles produced in the complementing cell line are truly safe in animals--even non-replicating virus particles may have some toxicity or other adverse effect in vivo.

I, for one, would not want to work with this mutant virus outside of a BSL-4 setting until it has been extensively passaged and tested in animals, and convincingly demonstrated to be harmless. I am a scientist and a virologist, but I have to say that this "safe" Ebola system gives me the heebie-jeebies.

Tangled Bank 101

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Like Doing Experiments, But Better

I made Thai red curry with pork and eggplant today. Cooking is one of my typical weekend activities--I'm often too lazy or tired to make dinner when I get home on weekdays, so I tend to make several days' worth of food on the weekends. The curry didn't turn out to be as spicy as I'd like, but it's still tasty. And as usual, cooking has put me in a good mood.

For some reason, cooking always reminds me of doing experiments. I think it's because my field has many complicated assays which are very protocol-dependent. You have to mix appropriate proportions of your reagents together in the right order, let them incubate for a while, add more reagents, perform other manipulations, etc., and eventually you get your result. Cooking is just like that. Instead of protocols, you follow recipes; instead of reagents, you mix ingredients; and instead of incubations and manipulations, you peel, chop, fry, boil, stir, and bake. Any reasonably competent bench scientist in my field should be able to cook.

But that's where the similarities end for me. With experiments, you get a lot of failures. Oh, the number of ways an experiment can fail! Suppose you are asking a simple yes-or-no biological question. You could have complete experimental failure and get no answer whatsoever. You could get an answer that is unreliable because your positive and negative controls, which should give you a yes and a no respectively, did not work correctly. You could get a maybe. You could get a solid yes the first time you do the experiment, and a solid no the next time. You could get any combination of the above. You could open the incubator to find your experiment singing "99 bottles of beer on the wall" and laughing maniacally.

Okay, maybe not. My point is that with experiments, weird shit happens. But if I stick a pan of chocolate cake batter into the oven, I can be reasonably sure that when I open the oven door at the end of the baking time, I won't find (1) nothing, (2) uncooked cake batter, (3) 17 cakes, (4) a fluorescent green cake, or (5) pork chops. I'll get one chocolate cake. It may not be the best chocolate cake I've ever had, but 99% of the time, it'll be at least decent. That's easily a 3-fold increase in success rate over experiments.

So I guess I like cooking because it reaffirms my belief in my ability to successfully perform a procedure. It reassures me that when my experiments unexpectedly turn to crap, it's not because I'm a total screw-up who can't follow a protocol. Well, sometimes it is...but we'll discuss that another time. When I cook, I get the expected result and I get to eat it, too! Can you say that about your experiments?

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Birth Of A Nation

I've had enough! I'm sick to death of reading about the Clinton-versus-Obama bickering. I have absolutely no interest in reading about what the religious right thinks of McCain. Nor do I want to read any more about Spitzer and his thousand-dollar hooker (and people thought Edwards' haircut was extravagant). Given the typical US media coverage, you'd think the rest of the world didn't exist at all!

Sad thing is, I suspect many Americans do know the rest of the world exists...they just don't give a fuck. This would explain why our local news stations keep trying to outdo each other in providing "local news...the news you care about." It's possible citizens of every country are similarly indifferent to foreign events, but I doubt that's the case. My friends and relatives who live in various countries in Asia can readily converse about world news and politics. In contrast, I've had to explain to a group of college educated, upper middle class, big city-dwelling Americans what I was talking about when I referred to the genocide in Rwanda. Fucking pathetic.

I could rant and rave about this for a while, but what I really wanted to write about is Kosovo. Kosovo recently declared independence from Serbia and became the Republic of Kosovo, although this received little attention here. But what one might expect to be a joyous occasion has been marred by subsequent protests by Kosovar Serbs. These events raise many difficult questions about how (1) the right to self-determination, (2) coexistence of different demographic groups, (3) economic and political viability, and (4) the interests of other countries affect the formation of a new autonomous state.

It's easy to support the right of self-determination for Kosovar Albanians, but what about the Serbian minority? Are they to become Kosovar citizens against their will, or will there be a mass exchange of people such as that of Hindus and Muslims between India and Pakistan following the end of British rule? Is the Republic of Kosovo a viable state capable of self-government? Will it be in permanent conflict with Serbia as Israel is with some of its Arab neighbors? Will Serbia and Kosovo become new pawns in the political machinations of Russia and NATO?

To be honest, I find it ironic that countries which have experienced foreign occupation or rule, as Serbia has under both the Ottoman and Hapsburg empires, do not seem to develop greater empathy for the nationalist struggles of others. In any case, there doesn't seem to be any easy answers to these questions, and it's likely Kosovo's first few years as an independent nation will be rocky.

Why am I so interested in Kosovo? I'm generally interested in world events and politics, but this is probably also a mild case of transference. These issues are similar to those facing two countries in which I am deeply interested. Both of those countries have experienced significant political changes recently, and I am just dying to blog about these events. But I'm wary of providing information about my past that may compromise my anonymity. So for now, I'll just have to settle for blogging about the politics of other countries.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Would You Prefer Stupidity Or Apathy With Your Incompetence?

Nothing pushes my "rage" button at work quite like incompetence does. And lately, I've had to deal with a lot of it. In fact, I've become so familiar with incompetence that I can discern two distinct varieties.

Type 1: Complete And Unremitting Stupidity
The people I know who fall into this category are perfectly nice and sweet, and they try very hard. But in the space where everyone else has brains, these people have cotton candy or something equally unsuited to the purpose of thinking. Their incompetence is not due to lack of effort, but to a complete inability to grasp simple logic or exercise common sense.

One such person is a secretary in my department. She cannot seem to perform the simplest of tasks unless I provide ridiculously detailed instructions. And when I do provide such instructions in writing, she follows 40% of them, forgets 30%, and sends me five more emails asking for clarification on the last 30%. Frankly, I'm astonished she can wipe her ass without my telling her how many squares of toilet paper to use and how to fold it. I told my boss that if I ever have to work with her again, he'd have to supplement my salary with an allowance for alcohol. And I was only half-joking.

Type 2: Laziness And Apathy
These are the people who may be perfectly capable of competence, but can't be bothered to exert the effort. A prime example is a member of the IT support staff at my institution. On one occasion, I was having a computer problem which I had attempted to troubleshoot by doing the few logical things that occurred to me. When that failed, I went to consult the IT guy. As we walked from his office back to my desk, I filled him in on what the problem was and which things I'd already tried. We get to my desk, and guess what? He starts doing the very things I had just told him I already tried, and tells me it doesn't work. Well, no shit! He says he can't think of anything else to try, and leaves.

Other occasions follow this basic storyline: my boss wants to be able to do something--we'll call this "X"--on the computer. The most obvious way to accomplish X is by method A, so he asks the IT guy if the software can do A. The IT guy assures my boss that A is impossible--the program just won't do it. I spend 5 minutes with the program's help files and discover that (1) yes, it's true that the program won't do A, but (2) the program does do B, C, and D, any or all of which will accomplish X. So I end up having to teach the IT guy how to do his fucking job--using help files, for god's sake--when a few seconds of thought would've made him realize that X was the real goal. But heaven forbid he should go that extra step.

Honestly, I can't decide whether the stupid or apathetic version of incompetence is more infuriating. Can't we just have an Incompetence Deathmatch and let them knock each other out?

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Archive Meme...Finally!

Thanks to Jennie and Amanda for this tag.

Archive Meme Instructions: Go back through your archives and post the links to your five favorite blog posts that you've written. ... but there is a catch:

Link 1 must be about family.
Link 2 must be about friends.
Link 3 must be about yourself, who you are... what you're all about.
Link 4 must be about something you love.
Link 5 can be anything you choose.

I think this is a great way to circulate some of the great older posts everyone had written, return to a few great places in our memories and also learn a little something about ourselves and each other that we may not know.

Post your five links and then tag five other people. At least TWO of the people you tag must be newer acquaintances so that you get to know each other better....and don't forget to read the archive posts and leave comments!


Link 1: Family
I've only written one post about my family. In fact, that post was written recently, and largely because of this meme. I dunno...for some reason, family feels too personal to blog about.

Link 2: Friends
I am incredibly lucky to have great friends both in my personal life and at work. And let's not forget my blog friends too...you guys rock! :-)

Link 3: Who I Am
I'll go with this post. It was written during a period of angst about whether there is a place for me in academia, so it's somewhat more negative than my usual perspective. But I think it accurately reflects my inner debate on work versus life, and how to fit everything that makes me who I am into a regular 24-hour day.

Link 4: Something I Love
This one's easy--it's March Hare and Dormouse. Some of my labmates have asked why I don't go out with them more often after work. It's because at the end of the day, there's really nothing I want more than to spend time with March Hare and Dormouse. And if that makes me old and boring, so be it.

Link 5: Blogger's Choice
I'll select my first post, which was written when I had no audience whatsoever and was just talking to myself. I find it interesting to remember that I started blogging with no particular purpose in mind, and yet here I am with almost 100 posts and a great community of fellow bloggers.

I can't remember who's already done this meme, so feel free to ignore this tag:

Monday, March 10, 2008

Calling All Vodka Connoisseurs

March Hare and I need your help! We're trying to decide which brand of vodka is best for making martinis. Any thoughts? Cast your vote in the poll on the right. You can vote for more than one. If your favorite vodka isn't listed, leave a comment and let me know what it is.

Thanks!

How Did I Miss My Own IPO?

I was looking through my Sitemeter log yesterday, and noticed I'd received a visit from a site called "Blogshares." I went to the referring URL and found a webpage on my blog containing:
  • Current valuation of my blog
  • My blog's valuation history
  • Tracking of my blog's incoming and outgoing links
  • Valuation of some blogs that have linked to mine

Huh???

Wikipedia's article on BlogShares says the following:.
Blogshares is a fantasy stock market for weblogs. Weblogs, or blogs, for short, are valued by incoming and outgoing links which become business deals in the simulation. Each player starts with $500 with which they speculate on the fortunes of thousands of blogs by buying and selling shares.The most basic objective of the game is to trade virtual shares in listed blogs. Each blog is automatically set to issue 5,000 shares, 1,000 of which are reserved for the blogger who actually authors the blog. Players can buy or sell shares from each blog's page in the game, and can manipulate prices through trading and Artefact functions. The basic advice of 'buy low, sell high' applies.

Looking more closely at the "financial data" on my blog, it seems it's actually worth an impressive B$14,434,226.63! Well, it's not clear how B$ relates to USD, but it sounds impressive anyhow. And check out the increase in my blog's share prices since whenever it was first indexed by BlogShares:


Woohoo, I'm rich!!!

Okay, not so much. The 1000 shares reserved for me, as the author of the blog, are just sitting around unclaimed. It appears the other 4000 shares are all owned by one entity whose "portfolio" also includes 4000 shares of A Lady Scientist.

I hope this doesn't mean my majority shareholder gets to tell me what to write!

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Group Activity For Scientists

I'm in limbo. I hate being in limbo.

I've sent off my portion of the grant to the powers that be and am awaiting their reaction. There isn't anything else related to the grant that I can work on until I hear back from them. I have a bad feeling I'm going to get requests for changes at the last minute, resulting in my having to scramble to get them done in time for submission.

Hello, powers that be. Are you out there? Hello?

Being in limbo makes me cranky. But at least I get to whine about it on my blog.

The grant I'm working on is in the form of a program project grant. The best definition I've found for it is as follows:
The program project grant is more complex in scope and budget than the individual research grant. While individual research grants are awarded to support the work of one principal investigator who, with supporting staff, is addressing a scientific problem, program project grants are available to a group of several investigators with differing areas of expertise who wish to collaborate in research by pooling their talents and resources. Program project grants represent synergistic research programs that are designed to achieve results not attainable by investigators working independently. The program project grant is organized around a set of closely related projects bearing on a well-defined scientific problem. Normally, three to five projects are involved, with one scientist designated by the applicant institution as the principal investigator who bears responsibility for the scientific and fiscal management of the program project grant.

I was asked to be one of the investigators on this program project grant by a senior faculty member in my department. I've never been on a program project grant before, although that's not really saying much since this is only my second grant-writing experience. But I think it's a great idea.

Program project grants encourage scientists who work on different, but related, areas to think about how their work might synergize with that of others in their department. They promote discussion and cooperation among investigators who might not otherwise interact with each other very much on a regular basis. Most importantly, they force scientists to consider ways in which their individual expertise can be aligned to approach a shared scientific problem from different angles.

At least in theory. It's entirely possible that once the grant is funded, each investigator will take his/her share of the funds and retreat to his/her own corner of the sandbox. I hope that won't be the case...I hope we'll all play together nicely, but we shall have to see.

Right now, I just want to know if the PI for the grant is happy with my little piece of it. Is a little feedback really too much to ask for?

Friday, March 7, 2008

ROTFL


Okay, no more posting for a few days. Must...work...on...grant....

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Working Hours: A Synthesis

[Warning: Long Post]

Thanks for all your comments on my previous post! There were many really interesting points made, so I thought I would continue some of the discussion here.

First, the previous post was not intended to disparage people who work 40-hour weeks. Nor is the distinction between 40 versus >40 hours necessarily along the lines of blue- versus white-collar jobs. I have aunts, uncles, and cousins who work blue-collar jobs. Some work fewer hours than I do and some work more. Most people I know, including me, strive for shorter work weeks as EcoGeoFemme does.

The problem is that, for many of us, 40 hours a week is insufficient for achieving the level of success in our professions that we desire. Perhaps we ought to heed Arbitrista's and CAE's suggestions to get our priorities straight and develop healthier and more realistic perspectives on work and success. But as Propter Doc points out, some of us are simply too much of overachievers to be willing to ease up on the gas pedal.

Is working long hours really necessary for success? Clearly, being efficient at work helps by allowing Arduous and EcoGeoFemme to accomplish more during their work days. Incidentally, I hate the idea of "face time," which is one reason I favor an unstructured system in which I can set my own work schedule and am judged by my productivity instead of my work hours. Academia supports such work habits fairly well, but it's not possible in all professions.

But efficiency can only get one so far. An experiment I often perform is started on Day 0, must be manipulated again on Days 3 and 6, and must be analyzed on Day 7. If I were to never work on weekends, I would only be able to do two of these assays a week, whereas someone who is willing to work on weekends can start seven of these a week. Even if we work equally efficiently, that person would still beat me to publishing the results and, by extrapolation, out-compete me for jobs and funding.

This is the crux of the matter: long work hours are driven not by excessive workloads per se, but by competition amongst scientists for limited resources. I hadn't even thought of competitiveness in the global economy, as Arduous discusses...I'm still fixated on competition with the people I know! Propter Doc and I both have overachieving colleagues who consider their work to also be their hobby, passion and life. And as Doc-In-Training points out, we additionally have to compete against scientists in our field worldwide.

One competes for resources via publications; the more papers the better, and the higher profile the papers, the better. Getting scooped on a publication by a competitor decreases both the number and profile of one's publications. So one works harder and longer in an attempt to stay on top of the game. It isn't necessarily true that longer hours translate into more and better papers (there's an element of luck involved), but it's definitely true in my field that perpetually working shorter hours than one's competitors results in fewer and lesser papers.

Is there a solution to the problem of long work hours? EcoGeoFemme suggests adding more people to the workforce to decrease each individual's workload. I'm not sure that will help in academia since it will result in more scientists, each with fewer first-author publications due to credit-sharing, all competing for the same number of faculty positions. If we increase the number of faculty positions to compensate, that will result in more faculty competing for the same amount of funding. If we had the power to increase funding to a level that would support all the extra faculty, we wouldn't be in our current state of intense competition to begin with.

One could also choose to work in positions that are less demanding, as Propter Doc suggests. There is great variance in work hours between labs, departments, and institutions, but there's a catch: places that are less demanding also tend to be less highly-ranked. And there is definitely a "pedigree effect," based on the prestige of one's PI or institution, that influences one's chances of getting grants funded, even at the postdoctoral level. At the faculty level, working at less highly-ranked institutions will affect one's ability to attract high-quality graduate students and postdocs, which in turn affects one's productivity and ability to get funding.

So perhaps the best course of action is to follow Academic's advice and try to find a decent work/life balance by setting aside some work-free hours each day. I think it's also helpful to have a realistic notion, as ScienceGirl does, of how many hours one is willing to devote to work, and whether that will accommodate the kind of personal life one wants to have.

I decided at the end of my postdoc not to pursue tenure-track positions in part because I knew that the number of hours I was willing to put in would not allow me to be competitive in the type of institutions I would want to work at. What I have now is a compromise between career ambition and personal life. And at least so far, it's working out fine.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Bigfoot, Nessie, And The 40-Hour Work Week

There have been many posts about academic work hours lately. EcoGeoFemme, ScienceGirl and Jennie have all written about it. And one thing that keeps cropping up in these discussions is the 40-hour work week.

I've been puzzling over this all day. I've never worked 40-hour weeks. Not as a grad student, not as a postdoc, and not as faculty. Among my friends, there are doctors, lawyers, human resources managers, programmers/software developers, engineers, teachers, accountants, and business consultants. None of them work 40-hour weeks. None of the grad students, postdocs, or other faculty in my department work 40-hour weeks. Even the technicians in my lab work slightly more than 40 hours a week. Hell, even the contractor who remodelled our house worked more than 40 hours a week.

So who are the people working 40-hour weeks? The only people I know who work those hours are secretaries, clerks, and some lab techs. My labmate, D, knows some people in his neighborhood who work 40-hour weeks in mostly low-paying labor-intensive jobs. Between the two of us and another labmate, we couldn't come up with a single job that only requires 40 hours a week that any of us would find intellectually satisfying and would want to have.

Granted, the three of us are comprised of one PhD and two MD/PhDs...probably not your average population. And one could argue that all of my friends are non-representative as well because I've preferentially associated myself with other Type A workaholics. But I have to say I'm extremely skeptical of the existence of jobs that are intellectually challenging and that pay decently, in which someone could work 40 hours a week and still be competitive. And the reason, of course, is because intellectually challenging, decent-paying jobs attract people who are ambitious and driven.

So while I agree there are academics who work obscene hours and that there is constant pressure to work longer hours, I'm not at all convinced that academic work hours diverge significantly from that of any other highly competitive profession. Where academia does diverge, unfortunately, is in the amount of compensation for the hours worked. But that's fodder for another post.

What 40 hours-a-week jobs would you enjoy and want to have?

Phone Rage: A Vignette

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 8:30am. Phone rings.

Pleasant Female Voice: Hello. Looking Glass Medical Clinic is now closed. Our office hours are from 9am to 5pm. If this is a medical emergency, please call 867-5309. Thank you.

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:00am. Phone rings.

Pleasant Female Voice: Hello. Looking Glass Medical Clinic is now closed. Our office hours are from 9am to...[click].

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:05am. Phone rings.

Pleasant Female Voice: Hello. Looking Glass Medical...[click].

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:10am. Phone rings.

Pleasant Female Voice: Hello. Looking Glass...[click].

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:20am. Busy signal.

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:30am. Busy signal.

Mad Hatter dials Looking Glass Medical Clinic at 9:45am. Phone rings.

Receptionist: Good morning. Looking Glass Medical Clinic. How can I help you?

Mad Hatter: Hi, my name is Mad Hatter. I'm one of Dr. Dodo's patients. I have a 3pm appointment today, and I'm calling to let you know that I won't be able to make it.

Receptionist: [Silence]

Receptionist: Dr. who?

Mad Hatter: Dr. Dodo.

Receptionist: Okay...[typing sounds]

Receptionist: And you said your name was Cheshire Cat?

Mad Hatter: Um...no, it's Mad Hatter. M-a-d...H-a-t-t-e-r.

Receptionist: Oh, okay. When would you like to reschedule for?

Mad Hatter: How about sometime next week?

Receptionist: Well, Dr. Dodo is booked pretty far out.

Mad Hatter: When is the next available appointment?

Receptionist: May 24th.

Mad Hatter: AAARRRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

Exeunt.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Familiar And Foreign

I've been tagged by both Jennie and Amanda for the Archive Meme. I hadn't intended to put it off for so long, but the meme reminded me that I haven't really posted anything about my family. Given that the first link for the meme must be to a post about family, this is obviously a problem.

I've written before about being an immigrant, but really, I'm just following in my family's footsteps. My paternal grandfather immigrated from Ancestral Homeland (AH) to my father's country (FC). My mother immigrated from her country (MC) to FC when she married my father. I was born in FC and lived there for 12 years, then lived in MC for 6 years, and then immigrated to the US. I'm grateful for the confluence of migrations that produced the person I am now, but this broadening of horizons has not come without a cost.

My parents did not speak each other's native languages fluently, so they taught me and my brother the language they spoke in common, which I consider to be my native language (MNL). This unfortunately resulted in some language barriers with relatives on both sides of the family. Most of them could also speak MNL or English, but I remember struggling to keep up with conversations conducted in their native languages. And I was never able to have a conversation with my paternal grandparents without someone there to translate.

In addition, there were also cultural barriers. Spending part of my childhood in FC and another part in MC resulted in both of those cultures being simultaneously familiar and foreign. I know some traditions from FC and some from MC, but can't muster a complete set. I did not feel like a visitor in either country, nor did either country feel completely like home. And I remember always being aware of being different from both sets of cousins, which was exacerbated by not having spent my entire childhood with either group.

These problems have continued with my immigration to the US. My MNL vocabulary shrinks by the hour, and I often find myself reverting to English when trying to communicate something more complicated to my parents. More troubling is the feeling that the longer I live here, the more I assimilate into American culture and lose my native cultural heritage. Already, some of my parents' views and priorities seem incomprehensible to me. Granted, some of that may be attributable to a generation gap, but it seems the gap has been growing even though the difference in our generations is constant.

I know my parents are proud of what I've accomplished and of the life I've established for myself here. But I wonder if they would have still encouraged me along my path had they known I would end up embracing a foreign culture, marrying a man of a different race, and choosing to settle halfway around the world from them. I wonder if, in their heart of hearts, they wish they had kept me closer to home rather than have me grow up into someone who is both familiar and a little foreign.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

The Roger Clemens Of Science?

I had all these good intentions of spending the evening catching up on some blogging. I wanted to finish reading all of this week's posts on my favorite blogs, and write several posts of my own that I've been thinking about for a while.

But I have a horrible headache that's starting to make me feel nauseous. March Hare blames my addiction to caffeine. But I think it's going cold turkey on weekends that's the real problem! So I'm going to have to postpone the rest of my blogging activities and go somewhere quiet and dark for a while.

Before I go, however, I've been wondering about something. We've all seen high profile papers that are retracted because the data published could not be reproduced. I recently came across one in which all the authors except the first author signed the retraction. The statement by the authors said that the first author declined to sign the retraction because he maintains that the original observations are correct.

Why the original observations could not be reproduced is unclear, but it had been tried unsuccessfully by the original group as well as two other well-known and highly respected groups in the field. The wording of the retraction made it sound as if data falsification was suspected, although that's not explicitly stated. But it's unlikely that these suspicions can ever be proven. I'd be surprised if there's even any further official investigation into it.

So what happens to that first author? Even if he continues to protest his innocence, and even if no one ever proves he falsified data, the fact of the matter is that his high profile first author paper has been publicly disavowed. Does he then become the Roger Clemens of science--theoretically innocent until proven guilty, but with his reputation in tatters? Will anyone hire someone like this or is his career in science over?